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Quote: #368
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9 votes
9.7/10
L9 do you have any solution ideas in mind
BNet i didn't read your post :)


Quote: #115
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6 votes
8.2/10
BNet Failing a chem test

8/10
ENZO That experience rates an 8 on a scale of 10? Are you sure you didn't mean "failing a statistics test"?


Quote: #412
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9/10
~!unknown1337i~ I just drank an entire can of fanta orange soda.

It was great.
atresac whoa, a WHOLE CAN????

look out guys! unknown is OUT OF CONTROL!!!!!
atresac i mean, gosh, a whole can... that's like..... 12 ounces!!! twelve WHOLE fluid ounces!!! holy MOLEY!!
atresac that's a whopping 160 calories!
atresac and forty-four grams of sugar, FIFTEEN PERCENT of your daily recommended dosage!
atresac not to mention the fifty-five milligrams of sodium, a jaw-dropping two percent of your daily recommended allowance!
atresac unknown, you MUST be yanking me when you are telling me you consumed a can consisting of a mixture of Carbonated water, sugar, orange fruit from concentrate (5%), citric acid, vegetable concentrates (carrot and pumpkin), natural orange flavouring with other natural flavourings, preservative (potassium sorbate), malic acid, acidity regulator (sodium citrate), sweeteners (acesulfame-K, aspartame), antioxidant (ascorbic acid), stabiliser (guar gum). Contains a source of phenylalanine.
atresac the acidity regulator (sodium citrate) dude!!!!!! GAD-ZOOKS.


Quote: #380
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6 votes
9.3/10
BNet my salary is literally infinite
BNet my bi-weekly paycheck is just a note of surrender from every nation on earth


Quote: #187
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4 votes
9.8/10
mistero della mente guy from shitmydadsays


has a new york times top 10 best selling book and a fucking program to air on CBS with william shatner in it
BNet more like fakemyfakefake
mistero della mente oh yeah it's definitely fake.
BNet what if he really did start off with this, but his dad died right as he was getting to be famous

so from that point he just made shit up to keep it going >;p
Kazuya Mishima NDF should write a book.
mistero della mente LOL
mistero della mente @Net
mistero della mente well i mean my lol was pretty obvious who it was directed towards
mistero della mente i just wanted to make sure kaz knew
BNet LOL
BNet @ mistero, not kaz
BNet my LOL, that is
BNet it was directed towards mistero
mistero della mente LMAO
mistero della mente sorry kaz, still not to you


Quote: #47
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8.5/10
Amir25atw Venom was a beast
BNet Venom was a first-trimester abortion who miraculously survived.


Quote: #102
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10/10
L9 Howard the Duck

In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment.

We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read.

But the bitter truth we critics must face, is that in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so.

But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the new. The world is often unkind to new talent, new creations, the new needs friends.

Last night, I experienced something new, an extraordinary film from a singularly unexpected source.

To say that both the film and its director have challenged my preconceptions about fine cinematography is a gross understatement. They have rocked me to my core.

In the past, I have made no secret of my disdain for Howard the Duck's famous motto: "IF YA CAN'T TAKE THE HEAT, GET OUT OF THE KITCHEN". But I realize, only now do I truly understand what he meant.

Not everyone can become a great director, but a great director can come from anywhere. It is difficult to imagine more humble origins than those of the genius who directed Howard the Duck, who is, in this critic's opinion, nothing less than the finest director in Cleveland. I will be returning to Marshington soon, eager for more.


Quote: #93
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7.6/10
Shine Shine For Life

My nigs
D banned
punisher2 LOL


Quote: #224
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8.5/10
mistero della mente hey sac

milk my asshole
amir25atw my mom read this and asked me why i go to this site and she doesnt consider someone that would say this human


Quote: #299
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8 votes
3.1/10
amir25atw well you know what man whatever floats your mayflower

i, on the other hand, am going to poop on my neighbors porch and ring the doorbell during the final minutes of the football game

but the thing is, i'm not going to run away after i ring the doorbell

I'm gonna stand right there, point at the poop, look him in the eyes, and say "I did this."


Quote: #420
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8.7/10
magikarp so last night i found out I have a twin brother

When we were born my parents weren't able to take care of us both. a married couple in Atlanta were interested in one of us and drove to Michigan while my mom was pregnant and they stayed in touch until she had me and my brother. when we were born my parents and the couple felt it was best to raise us as our own person, not to let us know we had a twin until we were old enough. our parents stayed in touch this entire time and i guess a week ago they told Ben (my twin) and last night my mom told me. Im gonna talk to him tonight. My mom told me his interests and its funny for the most part we like the same music and movies but he has a pretty thick southern accent
atresac if there are two karps i am killing myself right now because this isn't what i signed on for when i entered this plane of existence.


Quote: #357
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5/10
Punisher2 kiss my ass knicks suck
xjt22 we do suck lol


Quote: #112
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5 votes
9.4/10
atresac chipotle mayo instead of the regular kind

10/10
grecian 9.5/10

Mayo will clog your arteries. Chipotle may is even worse.
Past ya if your fat
grecian Breaking news: Mayo is healthy if you are not fat.


Quote: #201
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8/10
L9 wisdom teeth in less than 12 hours

consolation plz
mistero della mente death,
mistero della mente agonising pain
mistero della mente complete dread and terror
mistero della mente they'll accidentally pull your jawbone out instead of your teeth


Quote: #388
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2 votes
9/10
Punisher2 whoo im in ndfs top most quote

niceeeee
Punisher2 I guess the better way to put it would be latest quote.

but yeah i dont go to see it alot but when i do i go to see if i made any.
BNet i, too, sometimes wonder if i'm hilarious


Quote: #33
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7 votes
7.7/10
magikarp There are cupcakes in the kitchen

And they're closed, i'm not sure if they're there for something special, should I take a risk?
BNet Play russian roulette.
L9 And start with six bullets instead of one.


Quote: #9
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5 votes
7/10
L9 Announcement

This is a little long, but bear with me. ;P

--

For a while now I have been working something called the NDF Quote Archive.


If you've ever visited bash.org before, you know what a quote database is. If not, it is essentially this: an archive of funny, interesting, or overall notable "quotes" from AIM conversations, forums, IRC (internet relay chat), etc. etc.


I decided to make a quote database for this forum. You can find it here:





Here's how you submit quotes. First, click the "Submit a Quote" link. In the input field labeled "Post #", type in any valid post number (ex. 89577, 90740).

From here, click the or - buttons to add or remove reply boxes. Once you have enough, simply type the number of the reply you want quoted in the input field labeled "Reply #", and hit "Load".

The message and its author will automatically come up in the large box on the right!

You can type "0" in the Reply # field if you want to load the original post, i.e. the main message before all the replies. ;) This loads the title of the post as well.


Once that's out of the way, just hit "Submit" on the bottom. And that's it!


You can check out the various quotes that have been submitted on the "Random Quotes", "All Quotes", and "Filter Quotes" pages. All quotes can be rated on a 0 to 10 scale.


A more detailed description of the QDB and its functions is coming soon, and that will be written on the "About" page.


So if you ever find a conversation here especially amusing, funny, or COOL, go ahead and submit it to the QDB.

And if you have any questions, feel free to ask.
atresac 8/10


Quote: #312
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6 votes
9.2/10
Unknown 1337 Past I'm tired of your shit

Im calling your ass out nigga im about to spank you lyrically
mistero della mente shut up and go away. you have been doing those word-association games of yours for the attention which no one on here gave you but i am going to indulge your need. you are so bad at what you are trying to do, the only applicable equivalent to the monstrosity of your 'raps' would be a blind man who's not just blind because of bad eyesight but his eyes were removed from his skull describing what a painting looks like. the past 30 years of musical concerts dedicated to feeding the homeless children in third world countries should have been dedicated to getting you to stop thinking you are black, even though you're like 13. the awfulness of your 'rapping' would have been foretold so those helping to feed the homeless could instead prepare for the introduction of your abhorrent use of the english language trying to form a coherent rap with actual verses that aren't a jumbled up piece of dog shit on a stick. if you were alive two thousand years ago and you posted those 'raps' on ndf, instead of crucifying jesus for what they considered to be his blasphemous beliefs, they would have crucified you instead. go away


Quote: #140
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5/10
mistero della mente bnet, idea

turn ndforums into a dating website.
Grecian this is a brilliant idea i will update my profile.
BNet i lold
Grecian profile is updated.

who is first
Magikarp LOL Grecian.
mistero della mente i lol'd too
atresac lol@this entire post
atresac NDF would be a great dating site if we had a single female member
BNet your profile rules

also, heartbreakhotel... <3


Quote: #434
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7.6/10
Punisher2 There's a grand prix track around the corner from my house

all i hear is

WHOOMMMMM WHOOM WHOOOM
Punisher2 more like grand pricks


Quote: #130
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3 votes
9/10
BNet MMBN3 CONTINUED AT 12:30PM

I left off right before some SERIOUS SHIT GOES DOWN so :3
Grecian shit that's 20 minute.

im gonna miss the first 40 minutes or so. how much gameplay do you have left? it has to be at least 10 hours right?
BNet uhh probably 8
Grecian still lots of time left then. i wont miss the ending.
BNet hopefully the ending will make enough sense for you =[
Grecian im struggling to keep up with the plot.

so far i get that a sarcastic humanoid duck is sucked from his world to earth in order to battle alien invaders.


Quote: #15
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7.9/10
amir25atw Idk about you but if the choice was between Team Edward and Team Gump I'd pick team Gump.


Quote: #45
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9/10
mistero della mente they've brought out a new pokeball for karp; it has bait inside to lure the pokemon in
~dr_dude love~ I bet all they trainers will have a karp!
mistero della mente stay in your posts.
~dr_dude love~ you fucking suck.


Quote: #256
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9.9/10
mistero della mente bnet

i think you missed my post below titled 'bnet'
BNet i will stream anti-minecraft
BNet you start the game with a shitload of diamond, gold, iron, and stone, and your objective is to put them back in the mountains where they belong.


Quote: #218
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6.7/10
Grecian Today is Canada day

so im going to a barbeque and i dont really want to go but i promised i would and

everything is closed
atresac what's a canada

The Magic Number was 1; 11 points!


Quote: #63
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9.9/10
atresac BNet

I hate it

you should make a drop-down box letting us choose if we want the traditional drop-down box or this gay button bullshit.
mistero della mente then change that drop down box to radio buttons to choose if we want the drop down box or the radio buttons
atresac that's retarded

he should make a drop down box to let us choose if we want the drop down box or buttons to decide if we want the drop down box or buttons.
Amir25atw No you guys are fucktards he should make a dropdown box for the buttonss and a dropdown box for the dropdown box for the buttons and then a dropdown box next to that for a calculator
BNet I'm deleting NDForums.


Quote: #42
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7.3/10
mistero della mente bnet and l9

if you can find me a translated a link to the past manga to be read online, thanks chumpals.
BNet count me out
mistero della mente this isnt a democracy
magikarp It's a dictatorship.
magikarp And i'm the dictator.
mistero della mente get out of life


Quote: #58
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9.3/10
magikarp Have you ever wished you could...

Milk yourself
Amir25atw Its called jacking off.


Quote: #177
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9.5/10
~dr_dude love~ getting your phone stolen when your at football practice

1/10

with 3 other friends =\\
mistero della mente maybe it's still in your hand


Quote: #189
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atresac my submission for an assignment which requires a day in the life of a six year old

7:00 AM: Wake up.
7:02 AM: Get out of bed.
7:05 AM: 100 one-armed push-ups.
7:05:30 AM: Grab child-safe scissors.
7:07 AM: Kill deer and use pelt for today's clothes with scissors.
7:10 AM: Begin climb to the peak of Mt. Doomdeath.
7:30 AM: Confront ancient dragon who is the physical manifestation of evil.
7:32 AM: Slay dragon with scissors.
7:35 AM: Carve open dragon to recieve breakfast:
6 pancakes
13 waffles
1-gross egg and cheese omelette
2 pounds of bacon
18 sausage links
5 gallons sugar-free maple syrup
7:45 AM: Walk to River Styx.
7:55 AM: Find smooth river rock.
8:00 AM: Shave with river rock.
8:15 AM: Take Cerberus out for a walk.
8:30 AM: Return home.
8:50 AM: Bow before father.
9:00 AM: Finish bowing to father, ask for proper clothing.
9:15 AM: Finish clothing.
9:30 AM: Ride pet utahraptor Yoshi to work.
10:00 AM: Punch in for job at razorblade mines.
11:17 AM: Accident in mines results in co-worker becoming sliced to ribbons.
11:17:15 AM: Say "Razor? I barely know 'er!"
11:17:30 AM: Pat self on back for that one.
11:20 AM: Shave again.
1:00 PM: Lunch break:
13 Big Macs
1 Whopper Jr.
1 Diet Coke w/ 4 ice BIG MAC cubes
1:30 PM: Use toilet.
2:00 PM: 800 1-finger, one-legged pushups.
3:45 PM: Finish toilet.
4:00 PM: Nap time.
4:30 PM: Snack time:
1 pudding cup and 1 banana
Ballanced on top of entire acre of livestock. That is also the snack.
5:00 PM: Return home on motorcycle you built out of razorblades from the mine.
5:30 PM: After relaxing from work, use black-magic ritual to revive dragon.
5:40 PM: Slay dragon again.
6:00 PM: Dinner:
12 oz steak (rare)
7 oz garlic mashed potatoes
Corn
2 Biscuits
Gravy
Zebra
6:30 PM: Hannah Montanna.
7:00 PM: 500 tongue pullups.
7:15 PM: Shower in sulfuric acid.
7:30 PM: Brush teeth with chainsaw.
7:40 PM: Pray enemies get cancer.
7:45 PM: Get tucked in.
7:46 PM: Story time (Green Eggs and Ham).
7:50 PM: Lullaby (Fist-Magnet Face II: Electromagnetic Boogaloo)
8:00 PM: Sleep.
12:00 AM: Dream of killing father with bare hands.



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