NDFQuoteArchive
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#328
Vote: 012345678910
10/10 (4 votes)
<L9> you don't have any voice-only tracks? anywhere?
<BNet> not even in your secret dildo?
<amir25atw> its not a secret believe me the only place big enough to put it is strapping it on the cieling diagonally

#123
Vote: 012345678910
3.8/10 (4 votes)
<Punisher2> HEY!!! quit make jesus look like the devil!
<Punisher2> bnet!
<BNet> I'm never taking it down.
<BNet> And I've decided to rename the forum to JJForums. And it's not going to have anything to do with dyn-o-mite, or any variant thereof.
<BNet> It will be Jesus Jesus Forums dot com.
<Yellow Jr.> Why the Jesus Jesus forums? Why not Jesus Christ? Or Jehovah Jesus?

#267
Vote: 012345678910
8.5/10 (4 votes)
<magikarp> My family cooked breakfast and didn't save me any
<magikarp> The fuck kinda shit is that /10
<BNet> in their defense, you blow me
<BNet> i would cook two breakfasts just to have the satisfaction of including you in neither.

#10
Vote: 012345678910
6.3/10 (9 votes)
<xjt22> o she had her period btw
<atresac> must have been a miscarriage.

#238
Vote: 012345678910
-1/10 (9999 votes)
<L9> two trains pull into a station
<L9> one of them says to the other, "boy, have I had a long day"
<L9> the other responds, "yeah, I'm WHEELY tired!"

#220
Vote: 012345678910
9.3/10 (6 votes)
<ENZO> I just talked to a mortgage lender.
<ENZO> That's right, fuckers. I'm buying a house.
<magikarp> I'm proud you're doing what most people do.

#70
Vote: 012345678910
7.8/10 (4 votes)
<Grass> yo
<Grass> whats up
<ENZO> Why haven't you drowned yourself yet

#77
Vote: 012345678910
8.9/10 (7 votes)
<magikarp> I hate vagina

#85
Vote: 012345678910
8/10 (9 votes)
<amir25atw> Karpppppp i gotta no when ur cominnnn
<amir25atw> No homo

#280
Vote: 012345678910
9.9/10 (7 votes)
<magikarp> BNet, there should be a preview option for making posts
<magikarp> So that we don't luke our shit up.
<xjt22> OR HEY WANNA GET LUKE TO STOP POSTING
<xjt22> replace the word reply with "pussy"

#55
Vote: 012345678910
7.8/10 (5 votes)
<ENZO> Looking back through those old posts I made
<ENZO> Past was a douche. haha. Claiming he had 60 mbps internet speeds. Yeah fucking right.
<L9> What a jerk!

#207
Vote: 012345678910
8.7/10 (3 votes)
<mistero della mente> My phone bill
<mistero della mente> as in, my mobile (cell) is �166 ($245).
<mistero della mente> IM SHITTING MYSELF
<Punisher2> go steal a bank

#271
Vote: 012345678910
9.7/10 (6 votes)
<magikarp> So I come back in after taking my dog out and fucking fall on ice
<magikarp> but it's okay guys, my fat broke my fell.
<atresac> nice fell.
<atresac> I assume your gelatinous body is still jiggling from the impact and it made you hit the wrong key by mistake.

#232
Vote: 012345678910
9.4/10 (5 votes)
<atresac> the "view" tab
<atresac> worthless piece of garbage/10
<mistero della mente> why dont you attach your eyeballs to your tongue and then view the inside of my asshole

#68
Vote: 012345678910
8.5/10 (4 votes)
<BNet> someone
<BNet> ntrtayn
<Amir25atw> Only if you return the favor
<Amir25atw> Wut the fuck it was supposed to be a joke but now i feel like a faggot

#350
Vote: 012345678910
4.1/10 (9 votes)
<xjt22> i have to do a speech tommorow guys im not even good at talking in front of ppl
<duelmonkeyx> Bring out your inner martin luther king

#378
Vote: 012345678910
8.8/10 (4 votes)
<xjt22> HOW WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY PAST
<atresac> it's a shame i got past that "least homosexual man in the world" t-shirt last week for his bday
<atresac> just seems like a waste now.

#142
Vote: 012345678910
9/10 (2 votes)
<atresac> Tonight at 8
<atresac> I am going to stream a movie for all of us to watch as a family.
<Magikarp> What movie? :L
<atresac> except karp
<Magikarp> Sounds like an interesting movie.

#162
Vote: 012345678910
9.7/10 (3 votes)
<Grecian> i actually have to cut the top off of one magnum and tape it to another magnum in order to get one to fit.
<Grecian> true story.

#125
Vote: 012345678910
9/10 (4 votes)
<magikarp> Who the fuck likes peeps?
<magikarp> I mean seriously, I got some in my easter basket. That's like getting candy corn on Halloween.
<BNet> *watches kaz write this post as part of his stand-up routine*
<BNet> except he added "am i right people?" and "break for applause"
<atresac> *am i right peeps?

#209
Vote: 012345678910
8.9/10 (7 votes)
<Past> Karp my lil sister could take you.
<magikarp> how old's your little sister?
<Past> 8
<amir25atw> I'm going to fuck your sister

#318
Vote: 012345678910
10/10 (3 votes)
<xjt22> o hey its free slurpee day
<Past> lil cups
<Past> stayed refilling that shit a few times before i left
<BNet> don't worry past, you'll slurp some big ones someday

#358
Vote: 012345678910
9/10 (8 votes)
<xjt22> I cry myself to sleep because of ddls racist words to me

#139
Vote: 012345678910
8.5/10 (4 votes)
<~dr_dude love~> im going to stream
<~dr_dude love~> anything you use want!
<~dr_dude love~> PIC NAO
<~dr_dude love~> fuck, you guys*
<BNet> well fuck you too!

#279
Vote: 012345678910
9.9/10 (7 votes)
<Grecian> having hard sex for a long period of time and hearing
<Grecian> "i dont think im gonna be able to walk" afterwards
<Grecian> 10/10
<magikarp> Why? Did you chop off his legs?

#8
Vote: 012345678910
8.1/10 (7 votes)
<BNet> Fuck you for being so dead.
<ENZO> you're not talking to Michael Jackson, are you?
<Russo> ^nice one

#289
Vote: 012345678910
9/10 (7 votes)
<Luke> so i left my hat at some sluts house
<Luke> get it back and HUGE cumstain on it... i puked everywhere
<amir25atw> dont go to sluts houses maybe
<xjt22> So many ways i can go with this.

#95
Vote: 012345678910
9/10 (3 votes)
<Punisher2> Sean Penn Hopes His Haiti Critics 'Die Screaming of Rectal Cancer'
<BNet> change "critics" to "victims" and you have a whole new level of controversy.

#156
Vote: 012345678910
6.3/10 (4 votes)
<atresac> wait there is going to be a live-actio smurfs MOVIE WHAT.
<atresac> this may end up being the best thing to ever happen to cinema.
<Punisher2> more like avatar part 2 rite

#3
Vote: 012345678910
9.7/10 (10 votes)
<Unknown 1337> who gets the purple name
<Unknown 1337> so that I could exploit that shit
<mistero della mente> yeah you exploiter you with your html and your .html files on your hard disk drive and your internet which you use to open up those .html files with your html to use your exploits

#351
Vote: 012345678910
4.6/10 (5 votes)
<Punisher2> J.J. Abrams to Direct Star Wars: Episode VII
<Punisher2> mr.o just got angry i bet
<~!unknown1337i~> I wonder how the story will go. I read somewhere that palpatine comes back and clones his body and starts fucking shit up again
<atresac> that would be the single most retarded thing on the planet and if you honestly believe anyone would actually write that garbage i hope you die
<atresac> that being said, i'd be ok with it, because fuck star wars.
<mistero della mente> sacs just a mad little bitch that he keeps iming me when i'm not here to duel even though he knows i'd impregnate him

#168
Vote: 012345678910
2.7/10 (7 votes)
<~dr_dude love~> School
<~dr_dude love~> 1/10
<Past> You probably have no friends

#243
Vote: 012345678910
9/10 (4 votes)
<Yellow Jr.> Hey karp
<Yellow Jr.> Can you teach me some Spanish
<magikarp> No.
<magikarp> That's spanish for "I'm going to kick your ass".
<magikarp> Nah but it means "No" in spanish and english. You're welcome, asshole.

#166
Vote: 012345678910
7/10 (4 votes)
<magikarp> does the shut up karp bot work on posts?
<Automated Shut up Karp Bot> shut up karp

#309
Vote: 012345678910
9.7/10 (6 votes)
<~dr_dude love~> eat me
<mistero della mente> you're like a meal for 12 fuck that

#231
Vote: 012345678910
6.4/10 (7 votes)
<Unknown 1337> Sac
<Unknown 1337> Why are you so angry
<atresac> well, since you asked
<Yellow Jr.> No answer
<atresac> oh look, it's yellow here to explain things.

#107
Vote: 012345678910
6.3/10 (4 votes)
<BNet> you lost at a game that was clearly designed for children who are bored, still in their mothers' wombs
<L9> Yeah, your mother's womb can be a pretty boring place sometimes

#41
Vote: 012345678910
8/10 (5 votes)
<mistero della mente> lol
<mistero della mente> i nearly gave out my password. im logged in but i typed in my name in the title and my password in the post

#373
Vote: 012345678910
4.4/10 (9 votes)
<og bubba kush> I am extremely gay.

#186
Vote: 012345678910
8.5/10 (6 votes)
<punisher2> we need to expand on our mexican culture
<punisher2> EVERYONE WHO IS FULL BEANER HERE SHOW NDFORUMS UR PAPERS!
<magikarp> I'm 1/2 mexican and 1/2 black.
<mistero della mente> and 100% gay


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