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Quote: #418
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3 votes
9.7/10
magikarp So I ate a ghost pepper, then rubbed my hands on my dick

Eating the ghost pepper was bad enough, I couldn't talk or breathe, I would go to talk and it would just be mumbo jumbo. My veins were sticking out in my head and I felt like I was having a heart attack. Have that all on video.

Then that pain went away and was like "I wonder what my dick would feel like" and just rubbed my hands on my dick and this is the worst pain I've ever been in.
magikarp I'd rather go through eating the ghost pepper three times than feel this pain on my cock
Punisher2 americas funniest home videos
mistero della mente americas most disturbing home videos
mistero della mente americas bleach your eyes out home videos
BNet americas got talent


Quote: #417
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4 votes
2.5/10
Punisher2 rice krispies
duelmonkeyx the cereal or the marshmallow bar
Punisher2 marshmellow bar sounds interesting i may need to try this.
Punisher2 wait u mean they make these with mash mellows too? I need to try that kind.
Punisher2 or is there already marshmellows in that? if so i never noticed them.
duelmonkeyx thats how they're stuck together
Punisher2 oh i never knew that.


Quote: #416
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4 votes
3.8/10
magikarp I'd rather go through eating the ghost pepper three times than feel this pain on my cock
atresac you should put it in a wood chipper to ease the pain


Quote: #415
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8.7/10
BNet "Cocoa puffs turns everything chocolaty, even the milk!"
Omgsports2 Ur mouth too
BNet xjt schooling me on chocolate over here


Quote: #414
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4 votes
9.5/10
atresac i'll be nice to ddl
atresac hey ddl, have a nice daFUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EAT EVERY!!!! SINGLE!!!!!!!!!!! DICK ON EARTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
atresac shit, i messed up.


Quote: #413
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3 votes
10/10
purpngold49er xjt i can help you too dumbass im about to be 26
Omgsports2 yea your a 26 year old who talks about sports with 19 year olds who you uses to prostitute out as spammers on a gaming website, lets not forget you but fake jerseys out of vans, you need to get out of the house and find a better life u hikkomori prick


Quote: #412
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9/10
~!unknown1337i~ I just drank an entire can of fanta orange soda.

It was great.
atresac whoa, a WHOLE CAN????

look out guys! unknown is OUT OF CONTROL!!!!!
atresac i mean, gosh, a whole can... that's like..... 12 ounces!!! twelve WHOLE fluid ounces!!! holy MOLEY!!
atresac that's a whopping 160 calories!
atresac and forty-four grams of sugar, FIFTEEN PERCENT of your daily recommended dosage!
atresac not to mention the fifty-five milligrams of sodium, a jaw-dropping two percent of your daily recommended allowance!
atresac unknown, you MUST be yanking me when you are telling me you consumed a can consisting of a mixture of Carbonated water, sugar, orange fruit from concentrate (5%), citric acid, vegetable concentrates (carrot and pumpkin), natural orange flavouring with other natural flavourings, preservative (potassium sorbate), malic acid, acidity regulator (sodium citrate), sweeteners (acesulfame-K, aspartame), antioxidant (ascorbic acid), stabiliser (guar gum). Contains a source of phenylalanine.
atresac the acidity regulator (sodium citrate) dude!!!!!! GAD-ZOOKS.


Quote: #411
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8 votes
6.5/10
Omgsports2 I lov coming home to no food in the house when my mom grocery shopped yeterday
magikarp Nigga how old are you and you're expecting dawn to give you snack packs on a silver platter n shit
BNet This. Fuck off, XJT22.
L9 XJT, with all due respect, fuck you.
magikarp Yeah why don't you ask for some breast milk while you're at it you little baby back bitch
duelmonkeyx Yea nigga you want me to cut your food up into little pieces too?
magikarp You want me to chew up your chocolate pudding snack pack then regurgitate it in your mouth bitch nigga?


Quote: #410
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4 votes
8.5/10
L9 barnacles

I went out to get a PS Vita today.

NO STORES had them! The damn thing has been completely discontinued apparently (or at least for the time being, I assume).

This is so much more stupid and annoying to me than it should be but it really ruined my day. :\\
L9 However, I did get a 32GB PS Vita memory card!!!!
Punisher2 nice consolation prize


Quote: #409
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4 votes
6.5/10
Punisher2 The one bad quality about this place is

my mom before i came told me to make sure i say thank you for things and so i have been like when my aunt makes me food or something.

But see yesterday she woke me up at 9 am after i stayed up late to give me breakfast, when i couldve just woke up later and then ate before doing whatever i had to do for the day.

I was tired all day because of that which is funny because she said that she wouldn't chase me around about wut to eat and wutnot because im a grown man i can make stuff for myself etc'

im with that though i dont always need a cooked meal when i wake up, i can eat cereal too.
L9 mention to her the night before that you might go to bed kinda late so you're gonna sleep in
Punisher2 ok thanks


Quote: #408
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2 votes
7.5/10
Punisher2 the heartbleed bug?

A newly discovered bug in widely used Web encryption technology has affected many major websites. The security bug, named Heartbleed, may impact secure Web servers. Cox Web services including MyAccount, MyConnection, Webmail, Internet Tools, and Phone Tools are not impacted by this issue. For more information, visit

this from my isp though you pals might wanna check out ur stuff though!

js
BNet It affected NDForums as well.

I'm sorry guys, but all of your credit cards have been stolen by me, BNet.
BNet Pun, I am enjoying an all-expense paid trip to the Bahamas as we speak.
Punisher2 harhar
BNet Pun, for that sarcastic remark, I am traveling to all competing resorts in the area and booking non-refundable suites for dates spanning the next 6 weeks.


Quote: #407
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9/10
~dr_dude love~ My current situation.

So you have been probably been wondering, "Hey wheres DDL??" "gosh! I miss how he blessed us with his glory and honor of attending such site" well yeah I recently moved to a p nice apartment for the time being. (reasons that will not be explained because my dad is dumb) but yeah had to move out of the old maxypad to a semi nice maxypad. I have to whore some fucks wifi to get online and do homework and shit. Tried using a hotspot app from cydia but 3G blows to the max so yeah. I also got to connect my laptop to the house computer monitor because the screen backlight is shot. I probably wont be posting much here until I move into the new house in couple months (2 tops but ehhhhhhhhhh who knows) But yeah I hope you enjoyed a laugh out of my expense. Hope to see you guys in hell soon baiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
BNet who's DDL
BNet seriously, who is this.
duelmonkeyx Man fuck ddl
mistero della mente only reason i clicked the link to this post was because i thought it was spoon

shut up ddl


Quote: #406
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5 votes
9.8/10
magikarp I tried to do a handstand in my bedroom

Got on my hands, started swinging my legs, sliced my forehead on my bed frame, landed on my neck. I thought I was paralyzed for a second until I moved. Whoo, what a relief right guys?
BNet god forbid you end up in a wheelchair


Quote: #405
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3 votes
9.7/10
Punisher2 i want some mini coke now...
L9 whenever I see the normal-sized cans now I'm so jarred by the size.
magikarp I give the bitches the same effect but instead of cans it's actually my cock
L9 After seeing your cock for a while, they're jarred by how huge normal-sized ones appear?
magikarp Goddamn it


Quote: #403
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7 votes
8.7/10
sesstehking Net...

Why do you keep correcting everyone whenever possible? Just because members of your site, note YOUR site, aren't always grammatically correct, doesn't mean you should constantly be correcting them. I'm willing to bet that a few of them could be below par when it comes to knowledge of the english language and grammar in particular, and when one of their e-friends continuously points out that they're wrong and therefore less of an intellectual than you are, especially when that particular e-friend happens to have made this website and administrates it, they probably feel hurt and may at some point want to stop posting when that e-friend is around in order to stop being unrightfully corrected and told that they are wrong. Or perhaps even decide to stop coming to your site altogether. You seem to feel you're the only human with the capacity to type up messages using proper english and grammar, thus creating a false sense of entitlement with which boosts your ego that you hide behind, creating a Battle Netmaster who acts like an asshole and picks and prods at any person who may make a grammatical error on his website. You should act with humility. Instead of being selfish, be selfless. You more than likely hurt a lot of peoples feelings whom weren't as fortunate as you were to have opportunities to be taught properly and have a good environment to be taught in whilst in their developmental stages. You were bullied as a child I'm assuming, and you now know why those children probably said those heinous insults to you. Because you, too, are now experiencing the feeling of being more powerful than someone whilst bringing them down without a care for their feelings. And you can only achieve this feeling of power whilst hiding behind a computer, taunting people whom consider you a friend...

In other words, you're a dick sometimes. But what's up bro? Get to work on a mobile ND.
L9 Is this post the new "read"?
BNet true that was a lots of thing i had to correcting lmao
sesstehking Since 9 of those corrections were not technically incorrect, they shall stay and you shall look at them knowing you wasted your time attempting to correct. Though I'm sure you achieved the erection you sought after that you usually get from correcting your fellow NDForum-goers. And two of the grammatical infractions were due to me typing on my phone.

But, #1: "that was a lots of thing" is incorrect.

#2: "i had to correcting" is also incorrect.

As well as the capitalization of the beginning of the sentence as well as "I" due to it being a proper noun.

But I love you bruh. Who's this L9 kid?
PurpNgold49er l9 is the kid that thought bnet grammar
BNet Past, I Believe The Word You Are Looking For Is "Taught".
L9 God, I love being more intelligent than most people.
BNet l9 mucho faggo LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sorry l9
PurpNgold49er el nueve es joto
Punisher2 im just happy that someone who isn't pun got called dumb.

Congrats sess you can be that guy now!
sesstehking Not only do we go way back Net, but I'm also smarter than 85%-90% of the dumbasses on this site.

And when did he call me dumb Pun?

AND I'm flattered you have a bulletin board dedicated to me. Do you still have the picture i sent you of me just cupping my cock'n'balls whilst my feet were aimed to the sky, thus resulting in a perfect brown eye shot? It was from way back when we were spamming and you quit while I was just really starting to develop spammers with PHP and such. Yet we continued to talk on AIM consistantly and constantly.

I was always too embarrassed to say anything but...I really liked talking to you...I think it was more than just e-buddies chatting. There was chemistry...
BNet Hey Sess! Couple things:

1. You're of average intelligence =\\
sesstehking Well, I'd be insulted if you were fully capable of judging my intellect. However, you've never met me just like I've never met you. Thus all I can be certain of is that you 1: know how to teach yourself web designing languages, which I was fully capable o doing and more than likely and more than capable now, and that 2: you're well spoken and have an above par vocabulary consisting of a wide array of properly used terminology and are not grammatically inferior to anyone on NDForums as far as I know.

I do 't understand why you wish to insult me, however...
BNet Sess, how is average an insult? There's nothing wrong with being average, bud -pats head-


Quote: #402
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6 votes
4.8/10
purpngold49er you wouldnt be talking anything on kobe anymore if you saw me
purpngold49er i would fuck you up if i was little indian kid nigga you soft
xjt22 OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
xjt22 I JUST SCREAMED
xjt22 I AM SICK AND TIRED
xjt22 IM GETTIN MY 100 POINTS AND LEAVING FUCK THIS SITE


Quote: #401
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4 votes
8.8/10
~!unknown1337i~ how a plane just dissappears is beyond me

Aliens.
~!unknown1337i~ At this point I'm thinking it blew up
Punisher2 what about a distress signal?
xjt22 Yo what if the plane is still in the air??
purpngold49er bermuda triangle
purpngold49er dimension unparrarel open up during warp speed
xjt22 Past always outpasts me :/


Quote: #400
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9.2/10
L9 lyrics aren't music
purpngold49er music is instruments that form a tune and the human voice is the number #1 instrument
L9 i'm saying the words are more important than the voice of the person who delivers them, capiche?
L9 now that's deep
amir25atw why is anybody arguing with a guy that wuld roll up to a pokemon yellow concert


Quote: #399
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3/10
purpngold49er Fuck all that , the dirtiest bitchs do that and give the bitch that wants to dome you some herpes you dont want that. There better out just making out on my dick, then passing each other herpes.
xjt22 what
purpngold49er ok ill try to sound as white as possible

so dude there is like this chick i was trying to hook up with but she got drunk and starting making out with becky the neighborhood slut who we all know has a sexually transmitted disease , cause it was the "cool" thing to do, so now im like hold on you cant suck my dick anymore cause you just made out with the garbage truck im good.

So I dont condone girls kissing girls cause some dirty std slut will come along and give them a monster called herpes, when they could of been totally making out with my wiener and been safe. But now we have a herpes epidemic and shortening of head givers cause of that blasphemy.


Quote: #398
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9.7/10
xjt22 need advice? got any questions for me or ddl? ask here and we will respond with a video!

mistero della mente who smells the worst on ndf and why is it bnet


Quote: #397
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6.7/10
xjt22 i miss the 2010-13 jakey who would try to fuck different black girls who were run aways or bit his feeet or had pink hair or were my ex boyfriend, where the old amir


Quote: #396
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2 votes
9.5/10
duelmonkeyx what would you do

So i was walking to my car after class ended today and this girl i had class with a year and a half ago says hey to me. we dont really know each other that well but we just talk whenever we see each other. Then we start talking and we end up in her car because its cold outside. then randomly she asks me what her name is and im like wtf i dont know. i was hoping the name would pop up in my head but its not a common name because shes indian. I usually forget the persons name within 5 seconds of meeting somebody new because im too focused on saying my name.

anyways what would you niggas have done?
magikarp As soon as she asked what her name was you should have been like "Did you hit your head? Do you have Amnesia? RUHHHHH ROOOHHHHH WE NEED TO GET YOU TO THE HOSPITAL ASAP" then push her out of her car, get in the driver's seat, tell her to get into the passenger seat quick or else you're driving to the hospital without her.


Quote: #395
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2/10
xjt22 Russel wilson is a cute indian


Quote: #394
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10/10
BNet no offense past but

i would rather hire zaza to moderate my site than you


Quote: #393
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3 votes
9.3/10
mistero della mente hes a great friend i enjoy his company

please l9 correct my grammar i need it please
Punisher2 he doesnt correct me anymore so hes been more enjoyable lately.

or maybe i have been less dumb, who knows?
BNet maybe he's given up hope


Quote: #392
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6 votes
9/10
Theheight You guys should just let me win the lottery every week
L9 Fuck off, TheHeight! Nobody fucking asked you!
Theheight Nobody asked anything at all
Theheight Bitch
L9 Shut the fuck up, little pussy faggot.
Theheight Aww did I offend you L9? Continue to call me things over an internet forum, I'm sure that is really going to get to me eventually.
L9 You act like you're hot shit, but you're nothing but a little bitch ass. For real. Fucking no-life, punkass little kid.
L9 Dude, I feel fucking sorry for you. Real talk.
Theheight Ugh surely there is someone on NDForums that is better at trolling than you, I'm sure even Punisher could do a better job than you right now and he seems like the nicest guy on this site too.
Theheight Do I need to give you some info to work with? Maybe to actually get you started?
L9 What info do I need? You're a pussy-ass with no life and no friends.
Theheight What the fuck is a pussy-ass? Haha like that isn't even an insult I have no idea what that even is supposes to be implying. And here is your chance to really get it started. Go ahead and tell me what leads you to believe I have no life and no friends.
Theheight And if you try to say I am a "pussy-ass" ever again then you automatically lose.
L9 You can keep talking smack about me but that won't help you lose your virginity or cure your micropenis.
Theheight Oh I knew the penis jokes were going to come into play eventually. I think the only thing left you have in your sorry little arsenal now is to make some bad insult about my mom, right?
L9 Your life was a bad insult to your mom.
Theheight Hmm I still have yet to hear one good remark that actually was clever enough to affect me. Should I start using really bad grammar because that might be able to give you a fresh start? Or do you just want to give up for the night, Google some new insults and try again tomorrow?
L9 Man, I should waste your faggot ass. Fucking bitch.
Theheight You say that as if it's not what you've been trying to do for the past 30 minutes
L9 If we could go head to head I'd pound your cute, round, pink little ass.
Theheight To be honest, if we met head to head, you would only come up to about my shoulders at best. And if you feel like coming up to Tallahassee anytime by all means come because it would be absolutely hilarious hearing you say these things actually to my face and not over the internet.
L9 You'll be my Tallahassee Lassie, and I'll ride you all night long.
Theheight Alright well this has gotten to the point where I am starting to truly feel embarrassed for you. If you ever try something like this again later I am probably just going to pretend to be offended so you don't have to end up at this desperate point ever again.
L9 Later, butt-gay-poop.
Theheight Haha have a good night.
L9 Wow man, you are completely pathetic. Do you just sit around on the internet and shit-talk people all day? Do you have any life at all? (Wait, scratch that. I already know the answer. To that one.)


Quote: #391
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4 votes
7.5/10
L9 just re-bought the same earbuds I was using

and decided I'd take better care of them this time.

the bass isn't as good with these new ones though for some reason. :^(
BNet try adding a little lemon seasoning to your bass!
BNet lmfao
BNet hahaha


Quote: #390
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8.2/10
PurpNGold49er lets be real tho none of you know the american hustle no one here
amir25atw especially you
xjt22 Past is such a robot with his typical replies
PurpNGold49er the anti hustlers
amir25atw you prolly had to hustle hard 2 ge TV that underwear model exposure


Quote: #389
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9/10
Yellow Jr. Hey L9

I bet you haven't even read all the Harry Potter books and you go on like you know English so fucking good you ain't know shit from a brick
L9 Shut up. I know English great. My English is great.
PurpNGold49er l9 > bnet

as far as english

but bnet > l9 everything other then that
BNet Excuse me, Past, but I believe you mean "everything other thin that." Thin is used for comparison, you Neanderthal.
PurpNGold49er stop being mad l9 is better at english
BNet Please, please reconsider! I know a lot (two words) of English words that are in the dictionary, I know so many grammars, I write professional books.
BNet I was once praised with the following: "Knows a lot (two words) of English words that are in the dictionary, knows so many grammars, writes professional books."


Quote: #388
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9/10
Punisher2 whoo im in ndfs top most quote

niceeeee
Punisher2 I guess the better way to put it would be latest quote.

but yeah i dont go to see it alot but when i do i go to see if i made any.
BNet i, too, sometimes wonder if i'm hilarious



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